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I literally just watched Emma Blackery’s video entitled; “Feel Good 101: Depression.” Hence the title. And I just wanted to touch–more like agree with one of the things she said, when she was talking about selfishness. One thing she talked about was doing things for yourself, small things, big things, just…. stuff, you know? I’ll link the video just below here, but what I’m getting at is that she wanted you to know that even if you aren’t in a place where you can talk to someone, it’s important that we at least try and enjoy bits and pieces of life to the best of our ability.

I can totally vouch for her on the selfishness thing. Like she said, don’t be a big asshole about it lol, but the reason I got depression originally was because I didn’t give a crap about myself. All I cared about was other people, family mainly. Which SOUNDS like a really brave and selfless thing to do for your family… but it’s not….. when you’re being an idiot about it.
I learned that I needed to care about myself, and excel. Otherwise, I would be doing my family, and overall myself, a disservice by not seeing what I was capable of. First you gotta figure out why life’s worth living, that I already knew though. What I still have trouble with is how I need to go about it. Just take a few proper steps in the right direction, and get help–For crying out loud, take it from me, you do NOT want to do this alone. So, if you do have someone, call out, cry out if you have to.
Just think, you are no less than anyone else. You’re in a bad place, but that does not mean you are broken for good. You are capable of great things, and I know this because you are human. We’re the smartest creatures on this planet (that we know of ;P), but we never act like it because for animals, they need to learn things right away, survival of the fittest. We take over twenty years to properly grow and experience life to its fullest, lol. As well we should <.< And to be honestly confident in whatever you want to do, that DOES take years, if we’re talking Veteran/Boss status xD
So, all in all, remember that you matter. Or let me tell you that you DO matter. Life is a precious thing, and a terrible thing to waste. So, if are able to talk to your parents about all this, I would give you the biggest shoulder-punch of admiration you’ll ever get in your entire lifetime. If you can’t go to your parents–me, personally, I’d  more likely than not go to my sister, cause we’re pretty tight, I’d say. All in all, I would encourage you to keep it in the family if at all possible.
A lot of people treat family like a bad marriage, like divorce is just around the corner. If you still have a family, hold onto it. I understand though that there are a lot of broken families out there, so there’s always teachers, in-school counselors, doctors–I think I would go for the depression hotlines that you could find the number to online, maybe a computer at school, the library, a friend’s when they aren’t looking ;), or just plain at home. The reason being is cause I don’t like doctors very much, not trying to talk you out of it or anything, lol. I’m just saying, in my own opinion, that if they put you on drugs–THEY AREN’T HELPING YOU!
Some people are really worse off that they need a pill, but if you aren’t having panic attacks every 5 minutes, I beg of you to just find a good doctor that you can really talk to and one that listens to you. Because that’s what’s gonna get your head in a good place, not some drug that you probably have done no research on whatsoever.  Some people can’t sit still… I would know. But sometimes, most of the time even, all you need is someone to listen to and someone to vent to. I would highly suggest also talking about things you’d like to do, or see, go to–blah, blah, blah lol. Setting goals can be hard, cause they feel so far away, you feel like your ambition will never last that long. But like a lot of things, it’s great to talk about it, and it’s great to keep it alive that way, yeah?
So, thank you for listening to my ramble on depression/learning to be selfish/treatment options. Really, I’ve been there, and it is not a good place. Twice I’ve been there and for two different reasons, so I must relay this back to you one more time, you do NOT…… you do not want to do this alone, believe me. And I hope anyone who is going through this gets the help you need 🙂
Bye-bye now.
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Know why? Cause it’s true. We were all that way once. One thing we can commend babies on is that, especially the ones with uncaring parents, they start from the ground and work their way up. We all start from 000%, and work our way up to 100%. Unless you ask science, then we only get to 010% xD. Which begs the unrelated question, “What EXACTLY are we capable of?” As a Christian, I will say this for the community I walk with when I say “Imagine the day when God unlocks the other 090%….. whoa. Just, whoa.” xP.

Speaking of being a man of God, (and for those of you who aren’t religious, just a man in general, I suppose lol) I wanted to just say that life is friggin’ awesome, if you know how to live it right. AS a Christian though, despite I don’t consider Earth to be home… really, at all lol, God has a pretty good set-up for our time here. It’s beyond great. God or not, it’s a privilege to be alive. And I am honored to be able to taste life at its fullest. I think we should just acknowledge that, you know? The cliche “Life is what we make it” is so true that it doesn’t even sound it lol. At all really. It’s like saying “You can take on the world.” Which sounds awesome, but doable……. possibly. Possibly.

And you ‘member that I said life is a good thing if you know how to live it? You ‘member. It’s a funny thing, trying to figure out how you wanna live your life. So many complicated questions, and they’re all sewed together, every strand of yarn, in a scarf of doom. The sad thing is, that couldn’t be any more true. Life becomes delicate, much like a slight snip in a sheet of canvas. Very difficult to tear, until just the tiniest nip…. then it can all come undone with one swift *riiiiiiiiiiiip*

But it’s not always so quick to fall apart, sometimes it’s a slow pain, that doesn’t seem too daunting, not until it spreads. Once you realize what’s really going on, it’s already ingrained in your life. In essence, you rip it, and it’ll rip you. But it was like I was telling my friend last night, “When a threshold is crossed, a new power must be found.” And it’s like he said, “I’ll have to dig deep.” Very true, and nice choice of words by the way. That’s a common expression, but I still thought it fit the situation.

Crossing a threshold is…… well, for lack of a better word, hell. Personally, I live for crossing thresholds, it’s my bread and butter. Doesn’t make it easier, and you can cross thresholds by missing a few steps, and I don’t want to miss 1, so that’s quite difficult. But hey, at least I look forward to it. Friends, roommates, family, basically any assorted loved one, not so much. I don’t know why, they’re a bunch of wimps XP. It’s not a simple matter, but it is a much needed matter. A matter that needs dealt with. Otherwise, you’re just painting your way back to a bad place. And as a dentist might say, “Ain’t that the tooth!”

And if Gon, from Hunter x Hunter, IS like Naruto, from what I hear, then I can appeal to the Nuh-roo-toe fan (jaykay, not serious here, Naruto fans) in my friend, cause this post is pretty much both directed at, and inspired by him. Isn’t it Naruto who never gives in? Isn’t it Naruto that goes into a fight that he initially cannot win? Isn’t it NARUTO that will go far cause his heart is more stubborn than anyone in that show?!……. Isn’t he? I wouldn’t know lol. Either way, isn’t it you who was able to put up with my crap for nearly 2 years now? I would imagine that’s prepared you for a LITTLE bit. Speaking of which, did you not say that I inspired you to make a cartoon? …..That’s not a part of this, but it is a word of advice. DON’T try and make one until AFTER things are right in your world….. then pray for the passing of your cartoon lol. 100% serious though, all jokes aside ;|

I want to see you win just as much as the vice-versa, dude. And if I know anything, it’s that if you start on that path to obtain that strength we were talking about, then things really will only get worse lol. I think your best tool here is to compartmentalization. That’s why I told you a ways back that you should try and think about…. that one thing I can’t remember >_> The thing I said you should think about every day, if you could. Anything? Tell me if you figure it out first. Even though you and I both know… you’ll be the one to tell me -_- lol

I know this isn’t an intelligence thing, cause you ain’t dumb. And this ain’t a heart thing, cause you ain’t weak. This is a human thing, cause we all get dragged down so low to ground, and for so long, lower and lower as time goes by, we wonder why are legs haven’t given out yet. It’s been a while since I’ve been in yours shoes, but you know I’ve just been mentally exhausted. So, I can definitely empathize here. And I know you’re gonna find that diamond in the rough, cause that’s exactly what you are. Maybe a sapphire. With a little heat, that beautiful color can remain forever.

I told you last night that I didn’t know how to help you, or couldn’t give you much advice, ’cause it’s something everyone’s got to find on their own. But I’m still your friend, and I AM a jacob, so… since I DON’T know what to say, I think the only thing TO say is…. Close yours eyes. Close your eyes, and feel around for it. People’s eyes keep them from reaching out for something. You got a heart, and a brain. But why don’t you start with your 5 senses. They were put there for a reason.

We all start from the ground up, but most of us forget that we need to learn how to use what’s been given to us, all because we’ve lived on this planet for 15 years, 23 years, 50 years. So….. who cares? 3 of those years, a lot of us still peed our pants. 8 of them we’re learning our reading, writing and that one word that means math that I can’t spell. And forget the teen years, it’s like starting over. The pull that puberty has on everybody, it’s like,…… Well, it’s just what it exactly is. Emotion floods in, your capacity goes from a lake, to an ocean. Pretty big transition. It’s like, your senses to the world crack wide open. Life becomes a much bigger place.

Bigger can be scary. That’s why I know more people that shy away from life than get excited with full force, like me. Anybody who knows the world will generally shy away from life. That’s not illogical, no matter how sad that is. You can’t blame people because…. life is one hell of a thing that can happen to a person. And to my friend, or anyone that I reach with this post, (getting preachy, gross) everyone’s got that strength, the strength to…. stand up. To just simply stand up. If you got something to stand up for, someone, something, then you will, I believe that. And to those who don’t have something, or someone, to stand up for….. The world is a big place, much bigger than any of us care to admit. I’m sure that you can find something you care enough about. Don’t be lazy, there’s something, someone out there that’s precious, or can become precious, precious to you. And that’s a good thing.

So, I guess that’s all I got to say about the subject. To review, babies are stupid, living’s a privilege, but life’s a bitch. Or it can be, anyways. Your strength is there, it’s in me, your family, God. Which reminds me of that one lyric, from that one song, from that one movie, sung by that one guy. “Take strength from those that need you.” Sounds odd on the surface, but use the tools given to you, it’s not hard to understand. See it, feel it, act on it. Mind, heart and soul. Kind of like a pyramid group structure; Soul is king, Heart and Mind are the royal guards, and the five senses are the ninja/foot-soldiers. Do yourselves a favor, start with the foot soldiers. I’m out.

Bye-bye now.

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Waning: Lengthy post  *nervous chuckle*

Being a man of logic sure does have its perks. (Man in background: “Ain’t that the truth!”) One who can commit to logic like it’s second nature is a rare one, apparently. Or first nature? I dunno. I never really thought about it like that, but it would explain quite a few things that always puzzled me. Mental acuity though isn’t everything, is it? I think everything has a balance, doesn’t it? The mind is quite the popular one, isn’t it? Cause the opposite of the mind is the heart, which isn’t what we’re talking about. We’re talking about the mind’s other best friend, something I’ve never really found the right for. But it’s basically physical fitness. And no, that doesn’t seem quite right.

Anyone who reads this blog knows that I am a real-life curious cat. I may not be the biggest detective geek, or the smartest kid in the classroom, but that’s the thing about curiosity, isn’t it? You don’t really have to be, it’s more of a…. near-lust desire to experience anything & everything, ya’know? And BEING a curious cat, puzzles, and even more so, the inner mechanics of something, always strikes a chord in me. Making the more complex of stuffs the most desirable and tasty thing in my eyes alone, not to mention based purely on fact. Simplicity is, for lack of a better word, a curious thing too when it wants to be, so that’s up there too, and not on the bottom. But complexity is such a mesmerizing concept.

The mind is the most complex, and yet, simple thing on this planet… possibly. Probably though. Which is most likely the reason why I am so drawn to it, why it peaks my interest so thoroughly. But I forget! Mental acuity has a brother, yang. Although, in this case, I would think “mind” is yang, and physical fitness would be–see?! Doesn’t fit, nope. But yeah, physical fitness would be Yin. After all, martial arts itself was not invented to hurt others, but to offer peace to the mind. Individually, they are powerful, but together, they are a force not to be reckoned with.

Physical fitness…. What can I say about physical fitness? Well, I can tell you one thing, it’s something that I have suppressed for a long time, and my affinity for it. So, not so much the act itself, though that does follow, but the exact same affinity I have for mental acuity, I have for physical fitness. As torturous as strengthening the mind is, at least I could go as far as the mind could think and not get tired so fast. So, in a way, it was just easier.

But now, I have hit a wall. Control has gotten harder, and my current environment only makes it more difficult. If I don’t handle this now, it’ll only be a problem for me later. In layman’s terms, the balance is off. The mind is outweighing the body. The physical attribute needs to put his effort in too. It can’t just be lazy, the mind will not carry all the weight. That–that’s gotta stop. That’s gotta stop. But I guess this is what I’ve been working up to, so… I think it’s time I learn how to be bullet-proof…. that’s a metaphor, and a PoPS reference, try to keep up. But maybe I shouldn’t talk. After all, this title and theme of this post is “My Endurance Affinity,” and we’ve hardly gotten into that, sort of.

But I forget just how easily my heart-rate goes up, figuratively speaking, when I endure physical exertion. Like, when I run, I suddenly feel some type of… high gear. That’s probably more bark than bite on an average Joe. But with me, that can take me quite a ways. So, when I get this way, I kick it up a notch, (or two, depending on how my body’s doing that day) and when I do that… sometimes it feels like I’m flying. God forbid that I know how fast I am ACTUALLY going 😉 But I get just as much of a high from that as I do from psycho-analyzing somebody, or reading a situation from a psychological point-of-view.

This is gonna take some thinking about. Same affinity, but as they’re are traps of the mind, they’re are traps of the body as well. And I don’t know the physical attribute anywhere NEAR as well as I do the mental attribute. So, I don’t want to do it in a way where my body will give out and break down on me when I’m older. No over doing it, that’s for sure. Meaning, I need to know when to stop “drinking” when I’m at my limit lol. Which shouldn’t be too hard, in theory. But with my affinity, I should keep a weather eye out, just in case.

You know that whirring sound you hear when tv shows feature people who’s had too much caffeine, or sugar, or some experimental something-or-other? Or just when a giant machine is powering up? Yeah, that’s something like the feeling I get when I get excited. Hands start shaking, sometimes my legs. But most of the time, my legs are just whispering to me *creepy voice “Doooo it!!!….. DO iiiit!!!!” Jaykay. Ell-oh-ell. em-oh, moving on. Just had to get that off my chest.

Soooooo…. I can’t believe I forgot—well, actually I can lol. But it’s still unbelievable that I forgo–wha–hmmm…. Yeeeeah, I guess I have a soft spot for knowledge and wisdom, but the physical attribute will be glorious. Glorious, I say. But what does this mean? More activity, for sure. But what kind? Not saying dancing will open up any time soon, but maybe in the future. Sports is an obvious option…. hm. Cooking is another, of course, but I’m talking big cooking. Lot of preparation, and focus. And then there’s the plain direct option; Exercise.

This will be a challenge. Though I do admit to breeze through a lot of things in the world of my own psyche torture maze, like a boss. But I have reached my peak, and it was no easy task. And now that I have reached my peak, I can go no further until I catch my physical fitness up, for it is directly linked to my mind. In fact,  the mental attribute is like…. 80% mental, and 20% physical, and vice-versa with physical fitness. Simply put, it’s like walking. The mind is the left leg, and physical fitness is the right, and you can’t move the left leg any further if the right leg won’t move. So, even though I’ll be building character, and even more affinity for life, it will be great to taste the deliciousness of the fruit that shows you just how far the body can go, if nurtured and trained, just like the mind.

Seems like most people have it the other way around, so just for the record, for those people, you gotta work out your brain, not just in knowledge, but in wisdom as well….. duh. If it makes you feel better, if it’s any consolation, even though that part came somewhat easy for me, at least physical fitness will throw me around like a rag doll lol. Beat me like an old blanket xD. That’ll be fun -_-

This will require, and more importantly, take willpower, and focus. Concentrated focus. I say that cause my focus is fine, but my concentrated focus needs a LOT of work. So does my willpower. Because most of the time, it’s not willpower that keeps me going, it’s curiosity, a strong conviction, and/or stubbornness.

All right people, this monkey is signing off. Take it easy.
Bye-bye now.

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The title really has nothing to do with what we’re talking about at all. lol.

Hi, people! What’re we talking about today? Not witches, not people named “Sam,” and not lunch options. I wanna talk about code, more specifically, I wanna talk about the code of man. Not “Guy Code,” but–well, I believe that everyone should live by a code, espcially men, ’cause women generally don’t need one, they just know things. I was reading a manga just the other day, and one of the characters said that it was actually rare to find someone who can live by their code faithfully. And I was like, “whaaaat?!” This doesn’t surprise me, but I was still hoping it was wrong.

But then I thought about the internet, and how there’s that age old excuse “Get over it, it’s the internet.” I wasn’t aware you could treat anyone with any less respect than inside the internet, or rather, you would want to, or if it made a difference if you were on the internet. I mean, really? No respect these days, no respect. You can blame life, you can blame the parents, you can blame the peanut butter stains themselves, but I guess there’s not much you can do about i–Wait! I just had a revelation!

Maybe, if you’re one of thooossse people, then you can just stop 😀 Make the effort to not be a laz–just don’t spend too much on the internet lol. Have some self-respect, man! I mean, do you HAVE to act like an a-hole? Is it THAT hard to be nice? And what’s wrong with being nice anyways? I mean, I don’t understand what possible reason people have for acting like the dirt they walk on, but as for doing the right thing, and just plain treating people like human beings….. need there be a reason?

Well, it’s gonna be a short one this time. Hopefully, I can start writing again, because I definitely want to. Maybe even do some story junk, yeah? So, I–ohh! Before I forget, Platoon of Power Squadron. Jake? Creator of PoPS, if you’re reading this, BOO YA! XP. Kind freaked out about Jonas’ badassery, so I’m gonna have to go with “part 2” as my fave, but it was great! And on a related note, I don’t care what you say, man, I like ep 1 lol. Despite the difference in ‘feel.’ As in, the tone of the show was definitely different in the first episode, for sure. Some in the second episode, but the tone was definitely established by the 3rd ep. That’s just my opinion, of course. Keep up the great work, PoPS production! And, Jake? I’ll see you in a week. (Update)

Bye-bye now.

p.s. Yeah, that’s right! Don’t lie to Sebastian, wee-otch! ;P

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Some people think you need a child’s heart to hear the melody of color, and no doubt a child is probably quite capable. But the funny thing about a child is that in youth we learn, in age we understand. We understand, we know, we…. can appreciate the things in our lives, fully. Humans are notorious for taking things for granted, but that doesn’t mean we can’t still appreciate.

 

For as long as I can remember (no, really), I’ve seen the world in a…. different kind of light. I wish it was normal, and despite that it’s normal to ME, I don’t actually believe it IS normal lol. Like, a thick fog is not ever just a thick fog. a fan spinning round and round isn’t just spinning… round, and round. A slug on a pathway is not just a slug on a–nothing is ever really just what it seems in my head. It might not even be related at all! rofl. It’s where my joy for life comes from, and I always see beauty in it, even the dark stuff lol (not a good idea btw.)

But the fact that it isn’t normal…. I think that’s really sad! lol. I mean, God forbid 7 billion Saru’s running around this giant blueberry. But still, ya’know? It’s not just about enjoying life, but really seeing it. Having a moment be real, touching things you don’t actually feel. Yeah lol. The world is still sleeping while I keep on dreaming. Kind of sounds sorrowful, if you think about it I mean.

I just want to be able to use this ability. I forget that I have the honor of seeing life in this light myself. It’s kind of like…. the first day it really feels like spring. Man, do I remember what that was like for me as a kid lol. Crisp air, the whole neighborhood shining bright, and me and my bike. Back then though, I could only ride around the neighborhood, not into town lol. But you know, seeing it is hearing it, and vice-versa. Smelling it, tasting it. And the infamous touch. Of course, if you mention “touch” in this world, even a decent lady will think of something dirty lol. Now, you might really understand why I said the world is sleeping xD.

But how do I use this ability? Well, it’s not really an ability, actually….. per se xP. At the beginning of this post, I said a child’s heart is plenty capable. I think another way to put it is that a child’s heart can put out energy, whereas the adult can harness that energy. And at the same time, the heart can grow stronger, stronger than you ever expected out of yourself. A wise man once said that you must imagine yourself stronger than you ever thought possible, because that’s how strong you’ll become…. or something like that xD. But I believe it to be true. I’m not saying be a superman, or exceed the limits given to you. I’m saying….. expect to increase your output. It’s something that you can’t really understand at first, but once you up your game, it gets easier to see outside your limits, and find a way to reach that level.

Like, you know how parents say that you can become anything you set your minds to? (Such a cliche nowadays lol) Well, I truly believe that. A lot of people aren’t strong enough to even think to believe it, but it’s true. For the most part xD. Everyone’s capable of great good, and great evil, eh? And to me, you can’t get either of those with a little hard work….. that’s an understatement. It takes a LOT of work 😉 A lot, lot, lot, lot! >;D

It all just starts with one simple question…. what’s my next obstacle? And maybe you’ll want to ask this too: Is that a delay, or just part of the journey? Giving into life’s cheap temporary highs doesn’t seem all that satisfying to me. You see work? I see a ride that keeps on going, and uhhh, oh yeah! I’m gonna ride it for as long as I can!! Maybe I’ve been blessed with some pretty sweet, state-of-the-art tools, yeah? But it wasn’t eas–it STILL isn’t lol. What am I talking about? “Wasn’t” xD. Stupid. Past tense, get out of here! No one wants you! Internal pain is consistent, but it’s highly overrated though. I mean, really. I mean, really. Physical pain? It’s a bit more demanding, and I’d find that to be hell, but again, highly overrated.

Well, whatever. I think I made some good points here, don’t you think? I’m going now cause it’s 5:30 am, and I still need some sleep….. like I’m gonna get it lol.

Bye-bye now.

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As a man who tries to live a life of logic and order, I not only try to stay happy, even though I don’t have to try very hard lol, but I notice people who could be happier, and people who could moan less about things. Hypothetically speaking, being happy all the time…. doesn’t sound right, or is it just me? I like being happy all the time, it’s interesting, even if it’s only for a period of time. Just being happy for that long period of time straight? Sounds pretty good to me lol. Obviously you have to vent and assess your feelings, otherwise they control you when it should be the other way around. If you let your feelings mind you, THAT my dears….. that is good for no one >_>.

Life is easier in a video game, wouldn’t you say? Your objective is usually clear, you can hit people and most of the time they’ll just run in horror ;P, and if you want experience, you can either go out in the fields and get it, or  maybe find some sort of item at a shop nearby. Life isn’t that easy. But life itself is the most epic game ever to be created when you think about it. I recently rewatched a video where there was this guy who liked playing video games and I believe his words exactly were “If you were like me, then you would just complete a handful of missions, and then just cause utter mayhem on the city *talking about GTA*” That’s kinda what a lot, and I mean a LOT, of people are doing, and they shouldn’t. (That paragraph went soundly, I didn’t plan on both my metaphor and example to fit so nicely xD) Complete the game! Life is no game…. but it kinda is ;P. And really, some people take the virtuals more seriously than the reals. Take it from me my ninjas, women alone are a far more intriguing mystery than ANYTHING you will find in a video game. And if we’re talking about real life, there’s no comparison. Think of it like this; video games are like…. mini games/free play, whereas LIFE….. that’s story-mode, playa. Get up on my level B|

Went a little too far with the video game metaphor, and I kind of went off track here a bit, but bottom line here is life is like a runner’s marathon without a confirmed destination. That’s just as much a mental test as it is a physical one. And if you can’t steady your mind, you’ll give into the traps that come along. That kinda plays along to the same beat of “The path less traveled” quote, sweetness xD. I’m just going to come right out and say it, keep it real, and make sure you’re doing everything you can for THE best result with THE best method at your disposal, ‘kay? Anything less is really just an insult to yourself and loved ones….. no pressure ;P But tell me I’m wrong xD.

Well, there you go, some Monkey Insight. You’re welcome XP.

Bye-bye now.

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So, once upon a time, not so long ago, I was looking forward to last weekend. Why? Because I was feeling so much stress, and I had not really left the house due to my being sick, I was going to head down to my favorite spot in the city, just for the day. so roughly around…. from late morning to late afternoon. Friday was a beautiful day, and was perfect for the journey, but I had noticed my dear sister was in a bad mood. I’m always wanting to go on a bike ride, and in hindsight, that was probably my idea for transportation, but my sister’s always asking for a “walk.” So, I cut straight to the “walk” idea and say I’m going down to mah fav spot and if she wanted to come with me. She declined, unfortunately. But I kept the chat flowing, and she suggested ice cream, to go out for ice cream I mean. I agreed, and I got to play brother for the day. Not sorry my plans were diverted because of this unexpected occurrence, but I still needed to start my journey, so I waited for tomorrow. My sister said while we were out that Saturday would be sunnier and hotter anyways, so mreh! xP.

Nightfall comes and I realize that I got a haircut appointment the next day. But no matter, hopefully I shall make it back early enough to spend the day getting my head together. So, morning comes and as usual, I wake up late ;D. But I didn’t wake up TOO late, besides, the appointment was for noon or something. So, I’m good! :P. I went to get my haircut, as usual, it gets cut too short (no biggie, always happens xD), and to make a long story short, my birthday is coming up, so my mom surprised me and we whipped over to Best Buy to replace my “used” laptop for a brand “new” one! Awesome possum, or it would’ve been, if it didn’t issue a chaos permit. All and all though, everything was handled, everybody calmed down for the most part, and I would have a working laptop by tomorrow :). Something I left out though is that when I went out for ice cream the other day, my sister told me that we were going to the beach ;P.

*One day later*

Sunday! Beach day. And let me tell ya something, I love the beach, but for some reason, I’m never in the mood to go. Weird, huh? But I wanted to button off all the calm with a good attitude, cause my sister loves the beach. But before you people assume I’m being stingy, this beach has practically unswimable water…. unless you wanna catch a cold, and I just came off a sinus infection lol. But it was a pretty good trip down to the beach, I got to take some pictures with my new camera, we walked around, there was this spider-looking crab that didn’t walk side-ways. I pointed out the it might be the waves or whatever pushing him forward, and he’s like “Ugh! I wanna walk this way! Stop making me walk straight like those stupid two-leggers Dx” After the beach, we went to a Mexican grill, but my sister said it was more like a Mexican deli, which I would have to concur. But I liked the décor, and I liked my burrito, and there was a cute employee there xD. But my mom HATED it lol. She said her taco was dry, which it might’ve been, and my sister wasn’t all it that impressed. My brother seemed to enjoyed it though. Then we went out for ice cream, but sadly, one of the ice creams I used for the double scoop I got last time was not there. Irish coffee yogurt ice cream is just plain not satisfying without its German chocolate cake counter-part :\

Nightfall approaches once again, and guess what I said to one of my friends on this day, Sunday to be exact. I said that I would yell or scream, whichever one, if I could NOT disappear on Monday for the day, cause I like doing that, but I’m too considerate. I have to be all scrambled to do that. But what I remembered was is that I had a doctor’s appointment coming up fast, and guess what day it was, go head, just try and guess lol. It was MONDAY! 😀 At that point, I’m just…. “I give up.” lol. So, I go to bed, wake up, blah-blah-blah, I got to the doctor’s office, I signed something a clipboard had its clippy junk in, that was fun. Then I headed over to the waiting room down the hall, and waited for like…. 12 seconds. As the nurse was checking me out, I did notice a bit of high tolerance in myself. I was just being a plain good patient. having my arm at the ready, being all cooperative and friendly and stuff, ya’know? So, then we go to the exam room, where she asks me all the basic questions, do ya smoke, on any medications? That sort of thing. But it was all very light-hearted, she was nice. Basically, I had a good attitude and it just surprised me. I kinda remind myself as this one dude on a tv show, or in a movie that–AHH! Prison Break. Season 1. Only my nurse was old, and it was more friendly than…. lol. Same story with the doctor, best visit I had in a long time. Afterward, I was waiting for my brother, cause he was having a check-up too, and I started talking to one of the other nurses I knew, and that too was a good conversation. Just what you’d expect, how’s your sister, what’re you up too, blah-blah-blah ;P. I asked him about the wife and kid. He’s turning 2 soon, so that’s cool. I said I’d rather play matchmaker and be an uncle, cause having kids is just…. insane XD. I understand the weight of it, so that’s kind of why I don’t want kids, but I love them, so… evil.

Today’s Monday, so I guess what all this is building up to is a…. birthday present. You know the kind I’m talking about, the kind where you get something totally cool, but it wasn’t what you originally wanted? Yeah. I got that today. I wanted to go down to my favorite spot in the city, but I ended up comforting family and tending to some bidness. Can’t say that weekend was a waste, can I? Even though Monday isn’t part of the weekend XP. Truth is, I got something better than what I had originally planned. So, today’s lesson is…. try to recognize what’s good and appreciate it….. I’m still going though lol. This has a ultra cool moral behind all this, but I am still not giving up XD. Maybe tomorrow, maybe next weekend, but I swear, when I woke up and saw the clouds today, I was like “Ugh…. yup, sounds about right lol.” But when I came out of the doctor’s office, it was allll clearing up. You do the math.

It’s probably all in my head, but in my head it shall stay! 😉

Bye-bye now.

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